Mysteries of the Carpark
by The Bad Luck Kid
Summary: 2D has a disturbing thought while leaving his room one morning, and Gorillaz is off to investigate. What more can Kong Studios be hiding within its dark depths? [NO PAIRINGS]
1. Lateness

"Mysteries of the Carpark"

Chapter 1

I don't own Gorillaz. This is just a fanfiction. As in by a fan, for fans, in an entirely fantacular way. When reviewing, please feel free to give lots of constructive criticism! Please do point out any serious spelling, grammar, formatting, or factual errors. Also let me know if you think anyone is wildly out of character. Thank you.

--

2D had no idea what time it was when he woke up. He was groggy and his bleary vision was making his little room look very strange indeed. He turned over on his stomach with his face pressed into the pillow and let his right arm drop off the bed and hit the floor. He began feeling around the floor blindly for a cigarette, or maybe some pain pills. Anything that might clear up some of his confusion.

Just what time WAS it, really? It was dark, but then, it wasn't like his room had any windows, being an offshoot of the carpark. It was always dark there.

He turned over slowly towards his nightstand to check the alarm clock, but it was simply blinking "12:00". Huh. So THAT was why he kept having those dreams of flashing red police lights. Made sense, now. Classic, though, that. Things never seemed to work quite right at Kong Studios. They never lost power, yet the clocks always seemed messed up, and electronics would randomly turn off and on.

Two sat up, shivering a little as his blankets fell off and the cold air hit him. Of course, the carpark couldn't be heated, which was Murdoc's excuse for not heating 2D's room. 2D supposed it made sense...he'd never seen any kind of radiator and vents or anything in his room. In fact, he was pretty sure his room had originally been a storage space of some kind.

Now he looked around and rubbed his forehead, feeling a dull ache coming on. His room was dustier than usual, which was saying a lot. He turned and swung his legs over the side of his bed and noted silently that he had worn his shoes to sleep. Of course, he almost always wore clothes to bed...why change out of your jeans if you don't really have to? But usually he remembered to take off his shoes. Must have done some drinking last night.

He half-walked, half-crawled over to his computer, which was still sitting on the floor. He'd been meaning to find a desk for it, but there wasn't really any space for another table in his room. Of course, there were the two nightstands, but those were occupied with other important things...like cigarette stubs and half-empty bottles of ancient alcohol.

He slumped down cross-legged and set the keyboard on his lap and turned it on. He double-clicked on his mailbox and waited for his email to load. Three new messages.

The first was from Phat Entertainment...mostly likely informing him that his payment for his entertainment system had failed once again, and they were really, REALLY going to reclaim it this time...Of course, they'd been threatening to repossess it for months, now. They seemed hesitant to actually come to Kong and do it. He didn't blame them. 2D didn't even bother to open it, he clicked on the second one.

It was from Murdoc...that was a surprise. Murdoc never emailed him...and why would he need to? They lived barely 25 feet apart. 2D squinted and then groaned, rubbing his eyes. He could SEE the words, and recognized them as being English, but he couldn't seem to read them. He grabbed an aspirin bottle that was close by and was glad to hear the rattle. Three tablets fell into his hand and he swallowed them dry. He had a feeling he was going to need more later.

He tried reading again.

_Hey moron! We've been knocking on your door all day long! Why is your door locked! Since when does your door even HAVE A LOCK ON IT! You better not be dead in there, or I'll be in trouble. Get the hell out and meet us in the studio room. In case you'd forgotten, we're supposed to be working on that new song today. If you're not out of there by 7pm, I'm getting Russel to break your bloody door down!_

_- Murdoc_

Okay...well...that was a clue. Obviously it was sometime before 7pm, as his door was not yet smashed in.

Two hit the off button on the computer and changed his shirt. The one he'd been wearing had started to smell kind of interesting. On the way out the door, he grabbed a half-full pack of cigarettes and lit one. He could already tell today was going to be crazy.

2D shuddered as he closed his door behind him. It was even colder in the carpark than in his room. He walked over to the Kong Studios door, glancing for signs of life from Murdoc's Winnebago. He saw none, however, as it looked like all the lights were off and he couldn't hear any loud metal music pouring out.

He jumped as he heard the squealing of brakes from somewhere far away. He looked around at all the cars and sighed. Kong Studios was never very quiet for long. Which was probably a good thing, really. The place got quite creepy when things got silent.

While 2D contemplated the noises of Kong Studios, a thought occurred to him. A very interesting, very disturbing thought. He suddenly felt very cold and more than a little unsettled. He quickly opened the door into the hall and stepped out of the carpark, not unhappy to close the door behind him.


	2. Decoration

"Mysteries of the Carpark"

Chapter 2

I don't own Gorillaz. This is just a fanfiction. As in by a fan, for fans, in an entirely fantacular way. When reviewing, please feel free to give lots of constructive criticism! Please do point out any serious spelling, grammar, formatting, or factual errors. Also let me know if you think anyone is wildly out of character. Thank you.

--

"Hey, I think I've got the basic drum beat down," Russel announced as he put down his drumsticks momentarily and wiped the sweat from his palms onto his jeans, "But I don't know how well its going to mesh up with what you guys've been working on."

Noodle turned in her swivel chair and sighed, "I have been playing around with some electronic sounds and I think I've made something that sounds good. It fits the mood we are going for."

"Hey, hey! I don't want this track to come out all…technoshit!" Murdoc shouted in a slurred voice from behind a pile of boxes. The sound of sloshing and a loud CLINK punctuated his sentiment, and Noodle and Russel exchanged exasperated looks.

To be perfectly candid, the music studio looked slightly disorganized. Chaotic might be a better word, actually. That is not to say that it looked any different from usual; in fact it looked very much the same. Boxes and random bits and pieces of electronics were strewn everywhere and bizarre musical instruments laid about like some sort of undead marching band had exploded in the room. And, judging from the slightly wet and rotted look of some of the things in the dark corners of the space, something (or someone) may very well have done so. Exploded, that is.

Of course, posters adorned the walls, boxes, and were occasionally pinned to moving things. Like rats, for example. They were everywhere – perennial favorites included 'Shave the Whales', 'Your mom is on my friends list', a picture of a garden of inappropriate things, an old Beatles poster with an autograph signed "Larry", and a picture of the cover of The Great Gatsby with the tiny nude people circled in bold red marker.

There were dozens upon dozens of others, of course, but they were far less consistent. They moved around sometimes and often vanished or were seen stirring about across the floor. The rats were mentioned, yes?

If you were a normal pop band, this would be a very difficult place to create music in. In fact, if you were normal at all you would probably find it difficult to even stand in this room without retching. Neat-freaks would simply combust upon seeing the place, which may explain the aforementioned dead things in the corners.

Gorillaz, of course, was not a typical pop band, and so this studio fit them quite nicely. Sure, it was a little gross sometimes, even for them, but something about it just felt like home. In fact, all of Kong Studios, the whole building, felt that way – gross but damn comfortable. Sometimes you simply cannot escape the fact that living in your own filth can give you great contentment. Except that you might get leprosy. It's totally worth it, though.

But that is a digression. Back to the band…

The three members of the band heard 2D coming down the hallway a bit before he arrived. Russel and Noodle were elated that they might finally be able to lay down some basic vocals for an opening. That often helped when the beats of the track weren't coming easily.

Murdoc stood up from where he'd been resting his feet on a complicated but old-looking sound system with his bottle of alcohol still in hand as 2D opened the door.

"Hey! Where the _hell_'ve you been?" Murdoc said loudly as he gestured at 2D with the bottle, "We've been here three hours and we've got nothing done because you decided to have a little lie-in, eh?"

Russel looked slightly offended, "No, Muds. You got nothing done. Noodle and I have been doing quite well, actually."

"Shhhut up, Russ'. I hear your bloody drum beat. It was rubbish." Murdoc muttered back, and then took a swig from the bottle he was holding.

"What?" Russel stood angrily, possibly trying at intimidation, "In what way!"

"Please. It sounds like every drum beat in every hip-hop song that's ever been made that has a drum in it. Total scrappage," Murdoc replied and then laughed something garbled and insulting into his glass bottle.

Russel was about to retort with a marvelous insult that was so perfect, so witty, and so all-defeating that Murdoc would probably weep like a little girl, but he never got to say it so you will never know what it was. Ha.

This is because Noodle had been watching 2D carefully. Finally, she asked him what was wrong, for he had been standing in the doorway since he'd come in. He looked pale and shaken and was daydreaming at the floor.

He looked up at his band mates with his uniquely blackened eyes and shuddered, "I thought of somethin'."

Murdoc snorted, "Thinking? You? Well, that explains it, doesn't it? Haven't done that in a long time, have ya?"

2D shook his head. His uncombed hair looked even stringier than usual and made him look quite sickly when the blue reflected onto his pale skin.

"Tell us!" Noodle exclaimed, standing up and leaning her guitar carefully against the desk she'd been sitting at. She'd never seen 2D so shaken-up before, and she was honestly worried.

"Well," the blue-haired vocalist started, "I was jus' leavin' the carpark, right? And I was lookin' at th' cars and listening to some of 'em screeching their brakes way back in there, right? And I thought…well…who's driving all them cars around all day and night? I've never seen nobody, have you? Do we even own any o' them cars?"

The whole band was silent as they thought, and as they did so the air in the room seemed to grow considerably colder as they realized what 2D already had. They didn't own those cars and they'd never seen anyone in the carpark driving them. Yet there they were and had always been.


	3. Democracy

"Mysteries of the Carpark"

Chapter 3

I don't own Gorillaz. This is just a fanfiction. As in by a fan, for fans, in an entirely fantacular way. When reviewing, please feel free to give lots of constructive criticism! Please do point out any serious spelling, grammar, formatting, or factual errors. Also let me know if you think anyone is wildly out of character. Thank you. By the way, guys, while I totally appreciate your awesome reviews, you don't have to keep asking for me to continue writing this. Trust me, I intend to finish it. It's all written down and planned out. I wouldn't stop now. :) But thank you again for your kind words.

--

"Son of a bitch…" Murdoc whispered, setting down his now empty alcohol bottle and everyone stared at him.

"You know somethin', man?" Russel asked quietly, clearly also shaken.

"Those…bastards…" Murdoc said, looking angrier than any of them had ever seen him.

2D moved slightly away from him, "What's wrong? You know them?"

"No!" Murdoc shouted, slamming a fist on the box next to him, "But whoever they are, they've been staying in my building for over four years for FREE. All those people who must own those cars…not paying any rent at all! I'll KILL 'em!"

The tension in the room eased dramatically with Murdoc's display of…being himself. It felt much more familiar and must less betraying than their sudden discovery that the people making the racket in the carpark all the time were actually, in fact, people making a racket in their bloody carpark. It was much more comforting to hear Murdoc being a cheap bastard because Murdoc is the kind of person you expect to be a cheap bastard, so when he is being a cheap bastard it is never a surprise because you can always trust a cheap bastard to be, in fact, a cheap bastard. Because, quite frankly, it's the cheap-bastardy thing to do.

Imagine, now, that you'd always heard strange footsteps in your attic, but you never thought anything of it because it had always been there. Now imagine you suddenly did think about it and realized, of course, that those footsteps mean someone or something was actually walking around in your attic and has been doing so for years, but you've never seen them. This was, essentially, the same situation. But with cars. And a parking lot. And you weren't there.

2D relaxed, feeling somewhat safer now that he was with his band. He rubbed idly at his arms with his hands and started to warm up slightly. His initial apprehension at his discovery started to die away and was replaced by a sense of curiosity.

"We should find out who's doin' it," he said, carefully, "In case they're dangerous."

Russel and Murdoc both quieted and seemed to think this over and while Noodle nodded, "I agree. I do not think I can fall asleep tonight until we find out!" She sounded more curious and cheerful than actually scared. But when you're a powerful military weapon, you don't have much to be afraid of.

"Mmm. Agreed. I vote Brainache goes." Murdoc said, lifting his left arm slightly as if he were casting a vote in a meeting.

"What! Why me? I'm not goin' back there!" 2D shouted, starting to go pale again, "What if its monsters or somethin'? …I might get eaten! I don't want be eaten. Why don't YOU go? Nothin' would ever eat you. You go!"

Murdoc snorted and leaned against the box next to him. "Because. I bought own Kong Studios," he stated simply, as if this argument made any sense.

Russel frowned, "Doesn't that make you the most liable for this serious oversight in our security?"

"That was a lot of big words," Murdoc said lazily, "I change my vote to Russel going."

"Wait, man. Why me?"

"S'long as it's not me…" 2D said, pouting. He looked at Russel. Russel gave Noodle a pleading look.

She seemed to think critically about the situation, before finally she said, "I vote for myself."

"That's two-to-one, Mate! Have fun, Russ'!" Murdoc laughed as he pulled an old Bic lighter out of his pocket along with a crumpled cigarette. He lit it and took a drag, looking at Russel sideways, "What are you waiting for? Go! Discover! Do enlighten us when you get back."

Russel frowned and looked around the room for a moment, as if he might see something that would save him from having to go investigate the sinister carpark. He started to say something but closed his mouth and glared at everyone.

"Yeah, fine. I'll go. You buncha wimps."

Noodle suddenly grabbed Russel's arm, a very serious look on her face, "Oh, Russel! If you should die…"

Russel looked touched, "Yes, Noodle?"

"…can I have your stereo?"


	4. Fright

"Mysteries of the Carpark"

Chapter 4

I don't own Gorillaz. This is just a fanfiction. As in by a fan, for fans, in an entirely fantacular way. When reviewing, please feel free to give lots of constructive criticism! Please do point out any serious spelling, grammar, formatting, or factual errors. Also let me know if you think anyone is wildly out of character. Thank you.

PS: Sorry guys. This chapter has acctually been written for months...I just forgot to post it. Haha...oops. Please don't kill me.

--

Drip.

Drip.

Drip, Drip, Drip.

Something viscous and unpleasant-looking was dripping from the ceiling and onto Murdoc's nose as he slept off his drinking in the cluttered studio. 2D and Noodle were watching intently.

"How long do you think 'til he notices?" 2D whispered to Noodle, not daring to tear his eyes away.

"It depends." Noodle said vaguely. Then she said, "Just what is that stuff?"

2D looked up to the ceiling and tried to remember what rooms, if any, were above them, "I…think that's the kitchen up there."

"That doesn't look like food." Noodle said darkly. Considering that they were in Kong Studios, it was probably something much, much worse. In fact, it would probably be better if the identity of the disgusting stuff remained a mystery.

Some of the slimy gook dripped off the end of Murdoc's nose and onto the arm he was resting his head on. He twitched and snorted in his sleep.

Noodle and 2D stayed completely silent and waited tensely to see if he'd wake up.

Snort. Sniffle. GRUNT. "Mmmuuhh? Whuu…hey! What the hell is this crap?!"

"He's awake," 2D stated unnecessarily.

"Indeed," Noodle replied.

Murdoc glared at them before using the bottom of his shirt to wipe the stuff off of his face. Once he was sure if was all wiped away, he gave his shirt and slightly disgusted glare. Then he glared at the ceiling. But that's Murdoc for you; he's a very glare-y person.

"Is Russ back yet?" he asked, sitting up straighter in his chair and looking around.

"No," 2D yawned, apparently starting to feel sleepy himself, "But it's only been an hour."

SLAM.

The three band members looked up. Russel was standing in the doorway, huffing and puffing. He looked both afraid and exhausted.

"…Carpark…ran here…all the way…so many…terrible things…" he choked out, slumping against the doorframe.

Murdoc stared, "You ran? Wow. It must be awful, then. I mean…it must be the first time you've ever done that…"

Noodle glared at Murdoc and hurried over to Russel, "What did you see?"

Russel, starting to catch his breath, shuddered, "Zombies…weird ones."

Now, you might be thinking that that is an odd thing to say. After all, aren't all zombies weird? I mean, if I were to see any walking undead creature of the night, my first thought would be "That's weird." And my second would, of course, be "I say, perhaps I should run quickly from this walking undead creature of the night?" But as you will soon find out, Russel is indeed correct for calling these particular zombies "weird".


	5. Decisions

"Mysteries of the Carpark"

Chapter 5

I don't own Gorillaz. This is just a fanfiction. As in by a fan, for fans, in an entirely fantacular way. When reviewing, please feel free to give lots of constructive criticism! Please do point out any serious spelling, grammar, formatting, or factual errors. Also let me know if you think anyone is wildly out of character. Thank you.

--

Murdoc snorted and idly picked his nose, "Zombies, eh? Well, that's not unusual at all."

After all, Gorillaz had dealt with zombies in their studio before, and by "Gorillaz" I mean "Noodle", and by "dealt" I mean "beheaded".

Noodle looked incredulous, "Zombies? Again? I'm sure I got rid of all of them."

Russel shook his head, "No, these were definitely some sorts of zombies. But they were…weird. I dunno. Maybe they weren't zombies. But they weren't alive."

"If you're not sure, just have our resident zombie expert have a shifty at them," Murdoc laughed, gesturing lamely towards 2D, who glared at him.

Noodle furrowed her brow and began chewing at the end of one of her fingernails, "I guess I could go take care of them…but I was so sure I got them all!"

Russel shook his head, "No. Don't go in there. They weren't normal zombies! They were….they were horrible," he shuddered, "We can't send you in there alone."

"Could you describe them?" Noodle asked, very concerned. If Russel thought she couldn't handle them, then they must be pretty bad. After all, this is Noodle we're talking about. Noodle is a weapon! She can destroy the world! She can cleave an island in twain with her mighty skills! She can kill a hundred zombies armed with naught but a guitar at her disposal! She also dances, I hear.

He simply shook his head and sad down on an old box. He began rubbing his temples, clearly lost in thought.

There was a moment of awkward silence while 2D and Noodle debated as to whether they should push the obviously frightening subject. After all, if Russel was so badly bothered then it might not have been tactful to ask more questions. They didn't want to hurt their dear friend.

Murdoc, however, tactless and friend to none, made a frustrated noise and heaved himself to his feet before shouting, "OFF TO KILL ZOMBIES!"

His three band mates stared at him.

"What?" he growled, wobbling a bit, "There's zombies in our bloody carpark! We can't be having that, yeah? Forget that noise!"

"How drunk are you?" Russel frowned, "Since when do you ever want to put yourself in danger while others are still at your disposal? And while we're at it, how come when we find treasure in the secret passage, it's YOUR carpark, but when there are zombies in it, it's OUR carpark?"

"Don't give me that! There's only about a million reasons for us to go kill 'em. Er, again. If they're zombies. I mean, 2D, do you want zombies knocking on your door at night? I don't bloody think so! Unless you're into that sort of thing, which you probably are. Who bloody knows what you're doing in there when you're watching those zombie movies late at night…" Murdoc gave a chuckle before carrying on, "And Noodle! Your zombie-killing pride is at stake here! And Russel…eh…zombies are bad! You don't like 'em, I don't like 'em, so let's kill 'em, eh? Yeah?"

Another moment of awkward silence passed before Noodle turned to Russel and said, "That would be 'very drunk indeed', I think."

Russel nodded, "Yeah. It's hard to tell sometimes, with him."

Murdoc muttered something unpleasant and glared at them, before turning to 2D, "You agree with me, don't you? Brainache? HEY!"

2D startled and stood up straight from where he'd been leaning against a wall, "UH! What? What're we talkin' about?"

"Oh, for the love of..." Murdoc shook his head, "I need another tequila. ZOMBIES! We're talking about zombies. Killin' 'em. Like in your movies, mate."

"Oh, that sounds fine, then."

"Right! Now, eh, to the flamethrowers!"


	6. Thought

"Mysteries of the Carpark"

Chapter 6

I don't own Gorillaz. This is just a fanfiction. As in by a fan, for fans, in an entirely fantacular way. When reviewing, please feel free to give lots of constructive criticism! Please do point out any serious spelling, grammar, formatting, or factual errors. Also let me know if you think anyone is wildly out of character. Thank you.

PS: Thank you all for your kind comments. It is always a pleasant surprise to see them!

--

As he walked alone through the dimly-lit carpark holding nothing but an old crowbar, 2D was thinking. Thinking quite a lot, in fact. You wouldn't think so, but he actually thought all the time. He usually thought about things like, "I would like a cigarette" and "I need to renew my Vike prescriptions" and "I rather like how Igor Stravinsky emphasized dissonance in his music".

At the moment, however, 2D was not thinking very much at all about cigarettes or pain medication or weird ballet music. Well, maybe a little bit about cigarettes. But not as much as usual, I assure you. Like I said, though, at the moment 2D was focusing on the more important matters at hand.

Such as zombies and creepy parking garage lots and the fact that Murdoc had ordered everyone to split up even though 2D had told him that people who split up in horror movies always die. In response, Murdoc had simply told Russel and 2D to split up while he stayed with Noodle himself.

And, of course, Two had gotten the worst weapon. Despite Murdoc's drunken cries about flamethrowers, they didn't actually have any. (The new shipment hadn't arrived at Kong yet, you see. Bloody lazy Ded-Ex people.) And so it was that Russel was given the gun, since he couldn't run very fast, and 2D was given a rusty crowbar. Murdoc, as usual, ended up with the most powerful weapon – Noodle. Who needs guns and crowbars when you have a living and breathing zombie-murdering machine at your disposal, all conveniently wrapped up in a small Asian girl?

I'm sorry, where were we? Oh, yes! 2D. Walking alone through a supposedly zombie-infested carpark with naught but an old crowbar and a hankering for a ciggy. Right.

I say "supposedly" zombie-infested because, so far as he had walked, 2D had not actually seen any zombies at all. He was beginning to think that Russel was pulling their legs…though he had seemed rather serious about it all. Maybe he was going crazy again?

2D stopped in his tracks and looked behind him. He'd gotten pretty far. He could no longer see the door leading to Kong nor Murdoc's hideous, deathmetal-blasting Winnebago. Just a lot of cement walls and mysterious, empty cars.

"I'm startin' to think," 2D muttered to himself and the humming fluorescent lights strung on the cement above, "that I shouldn'ta mentioned anything about the cars at all."

Little did he know that he wasn't just muttering to himself and the nasty migraine-inducing lights. He wasn't nearly as alone as he thought.

But he soon realized this, because that's when one of Them stepped out from behind a pillar to greet him.


	7. Abandonment

"Mysteries of the Carpark"

Chapter 7

I don't own Gorillaz. This is just a fanfiction. As in by a fan, for fans, in an entirely fantacular way. When reviewing, please feel free to give lots of constructive criticism! Please do point out any serious spelling, grammar, formatting, or factual errors. Also let me know if you think anyone is wildly out of character. Thank you.

--

In the far reaches of the carpark, Murdoc and Noodle both stopped and listened tensely when they heard it. And then, all was silent save the occasional screech of far-away brakes.

Murdoc was the first to speak, saying, "HEY. Noodle. I just heard a womanly scream! D'you think it was 2D or Russel?"

Noodle gave him a sidelong glare through her bangs, "It was obviously 2D. If he's in trouble, we have to go help him!"

"Haha…WOMANLY SCREAM. D'you get it? 'Cause, 'cause 2D is a woman. Deep inside." And then Murdoc began to snicker to himself, occasionally muttering things like "womanly!" and "brainache!"

Poor Noodle. She sighed. Was it too much to ask to have a nice, relaxing day of making music, doing some T'ai Chi, and eating some delicious food? Alas, as she looked again at her terribly inebriated band leader, she realized it was so.

And so she decided that it was time to teach him a lesson. Or something like that. Probably just spite or something like that. But either way, the result was the same. And so, as sneakily and silently as she could, she slipped away between cars and left.

Murdoc, too busy being horribly amused at his own joke, didn't notice for quite awhile. Once he stopped laughing and took the time to look around he became very quiet. He turned all the way around, stumbling a bit along the way, and felt an awful tenseness rise up into his midsection. Or maybe that was his liver dying. It's difficult to say.

"…Noodle?" he called out in an uneasy, slightly slurred voice. He waited a moment and called out again, this time louder. Still no answer.

Murdoc suddenly felt very small and very weaponless. After all, he was standing alone in a dark, almost certainly haunted and perhaps zombified car garage with nothing to defend himself. Not only that, be he was surrounded by the sights and sounds of strange, empty cars which apparently belonged to no one.

Or maybe they belonged to him, he thought! After all, they were illegally parked in HIS building. So maybe he could claim ownership of them?

That was a warming thought indeed, but it did little to calm his anxiety. After all, if he was eaten by zombies then it didn't really matter how many cars he owned, how great a band he managed, or how many prostit-…well, that's a story for another time.

So, Noodle had left him. Fine. Time to find another weapon. Okay…so his options were as follows:

Go find Russel. Big man. Gun.

Go find 2D. Skinny druggie. Crowbar.

Hmm.

Well that was easy, Murdoc thought to himself as he spend off to go find Russel.


	8. Insanity

"Mysteries of the Carpark"

Chapter 8

I don't own Gorillaz. This is just a fanfiction. As in by a fan, for fans, in an entirely fantacular way. When reviewing, please feel free to give lots of constructive criticism! Please do point out any serious spelling, grammar, formatting, or factual errors. Also let me know if you think anyone is wildly out of character. Thank you.

--

Meanwhile, back in the rich and lively world of everyone's favourite blue-haired prescription-drug-addict, things were getting very scary indeed. Also very confusing.

For, you see, the Thing that had stepped out in front of him was not a zombie. Or maybe it was? It was hard to tell. It certainly didn't look like any zombie 2D had ever seen.

It was a young woman, perhaps in her early twenties, wearing nothing but trainers and an oversized Gorillaz T-shirt. She looked (and smelled) as if she hadn't cleaned herself in months, and she was stumbling toward him as if walking was a foreign act.

"Er," he started, "Do you need some help?" and he took a step back. Something about her just wasn't quite right. He clutched his crowbar tighter in his hands but tried to make it look less threatening.

She suddenly stopped and cocked her head strangely to the side. A thin voice crackled out of her mouth, "Two…Dee?"

Suddenly feeling very disturbed, 2D took a couple more steps back before replying with a small, unsure, "…Yes?"

At that answer, the girl's head snapped back into an upright position and a maniacal, horrible look of utter bliss came over her face. An expression that should have simply been "happy" was contorting her face grotesquely.

"Twooo Deee!" she screeched horribly as she held out her arms towards him, "I am your biggest fan! I love you! Gorillaz! Gorillaz! Gorillaz! Gorillaz! Grillaz! Grllz! Gzzrlssa!" she began chanting as she moved towards him steadily, her eyes rolling back into her head and her outstretched hands grasping at nothing. The name of the band became more and more garbled as she chanted it, until eventually it dissolved into nothing but mumbles and shrieks while the girl began drooling uncontrollably and gnashing at the air randomly.

So, naturally, 2D screamed like a little girl, dropped his crowbar, and ran like the wind in the opposite direction. To his horror, he saw more creatures similar to the girl slowly making their ways out from behind cars as he ran.

Zombies, Russel had said earlier, weird ones.

These were indeed like no zombies 2D had ever seen before. They were so, so much worse.

--

Special 2008 Update Note: I realize this fic has not been updated in a long, long time. I WILL finish it eventually. I swear. It may take time, however. I apologize for my laziness. orz


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